‘Survivor’ has always been about gratuitous skin. The reason they’ve never featured ‘Survivor’ in a chilly climate is the total lack of wardrobe malfunctions in the artic. They took skin to a whole new level this season by focusing less on the shape and more on the color. While the human form is a delightful study of man and woman, Survivor’s focus on pigmentation is much more compelling. However, the spin applied to the importance of their “research” is not only comical, it’s downright shameless.

Instead of coming right out and calling this a “gimmick to salvage their struggling industry”, they’ve billed it as a “social experiment” and host Jeff Probst is everywhere defending it. The problem with this sales pitch is the thesis of said experiment. For starters, what is it? What point/counter-points will it produce? Is it just an attempt to prove or disprove stereotypes and if so, is it apropos to talk about the results? Will people say, “See, the Asians are the best problems solvers, the black guys are the best athletes and the white people are the best at challenges involving paying off credit card debt.” No, God no. You could never say it at the water cooler and I could never write it. So what’s the point?

Along with ‘The Real World’, ‘Survivor’ has always been an attempt at anthropological experiment. ‘Survivor’ is a study of human behavior under extreme circumstances. ‘The Real World’ is extreme human behavior that leads to pregnancy tests purchased by the palette. These shows aren’t dissertations on the state of society. They’re showcases for exhibitionists to interact with blurry patches covering up the good stuff.

For those able to put their moral indignation aside to view the premiere, they saw it was much ado about nothing. The most controversial character so far is also it’s least stereotypical. Cowboy is a hippie member of the “Asian Invasion” and reminds me of last season’s Bruce. (Let’s hope he doesn’t experience the same blockage. I couldn’t look at a cheese wheel for a month.)

Cowboy jokes about Asian generalizations and says he’s never gotten along with his "own people" because he doesn't conform to their stereotypes. That is until he breaks out his Mr. Miyagi hand-healing impression to cure Brad’s headache by giving him an “indicator” on his nose. My little sister does the same thing but she calls it a “hickey”. In both cases, they seem to do the trick as Brad’s headache is gone. (Probably replaced by the intense burning on the arch of his beak)

Most of the initial dialect focuses on one statement and it’s not “karma is a bizzle”. It’s “Is this kosher?” It was expressed early on and I don’t know the answer. If I said to you the Manihiki team finished last, would you know who I was talking about? Now what if I said the African American team finished last? You’d know in an instant. But again, is this kosher?

My concerns are far more superficial than racial segregation. What I saw was the desperation reality television is embracing to survive. Do I care about the racial divide as seen through the lense of reality television? No. Do I feel compelled to write about it? Yes, of course. Is it possible for me to ignore the racial separation and write a breakdown of the challenge, the chicken piracy and voting alliances with some lackluster humor sprinkled in? No, nobody would care.

The only thing important about race this episode illustrated is that race isn’t really that important at all. Especially when there’s a million bucks in play and hot people have a cuddle puddle. And it’s not that I want to write about racial issues anymore than you want to read it. But when the “race” card is played, it forces you not to talk about anything else. So this gimmick, in a sense, worked.

The fact that it’s contrived and artificial and oversold by its over-zealous host doesn’t necessarily mean this stunt won’t work. It’s too early to write it off just yet. Sure, this was just another blatant gimmick. But then again, so is reality television.