This week’s installment featured more English composition, more gratuitous sex appeal and a belly-laughing moment that could possibly send George into a post-mid-life crisis. Last week’s effort met the hype as a lowercase “i” and some grammatical mishaps made the difference. Nobody applied what they learned as they put Dan Quayle in charge of dessert this time around.

All week long, I’ve been psyched for the return of Markus. But there were no fireworks as the guys feigned excitement and gave one of those “Let’s leave the boardroom in the boardroom” talks. It was about as pointless as the paparazzi unveiling tapes of Janet Jackson sun bathing nude. (Ah, guys, I hate to burst your bubble but 100 million people in the US alone have seen Janet Jackson naked. Thanks for the effort though. It was nice to reminisce.)

My Markus disappointment ended quickly when the task was unveiled. They will travel to Cedar Crest Retirement Home to see who can demonstrate the latest and greatest technology to the residents of the retirement home. It’s the Jetson’s meets the Flintstone’s with the cast of ‘Cocoon’ filling in as our favorite Stone Age family.

Rebecca is listed as questionable in the IR with a tender ankle which could hamper her change of direction ability. It turns out to be a break, so she’s obviously out of the game right? They’re about to hand the trophy to Billy Zabka but, no, wait, not so fast. There’s a murmur through the crowd that builds. The excitement grows and then explodes: “He’s gonna fight! Daniel LaRusso is gonna fight!”

Alright, I’m sorry about that, but they were a little over dramatic about her decision to play. She’s showing old people how to program their alarm clocks for God’s sake; she’s not doing high hurdles.

The guys try to make small talk and find the old folks are open-minded to their pitch, “I think the computer is something from the devil.” It gets better, or worse depending on how you look at it. Right out of the gate, we have our break out moment of the season, even better than “smooth as silk”. Clay asked George with a dead straight face and with all sincerity if people in “his” age group are set in their ways.

Folks, I have to admit, sometimes I wonder why I do this. Sometimes I feel lost, not sure where I’m headed. Sometimes I wonder how writing a reality television column at thirty is the highlight of my week. Sometimes I think I’m wasting my time mocking the misfortune of others. This, gang, is NOT one of those times.

You know, what’s funny about this is that George is probably like 51. He strikes me as one of those guys who grinded out 90 hour weeks for twenty years causing him to age in dog years. He was clearly irritated. He’s the right hand man of one of the most powerful men in the world and Clay just insinuated that he belonged in a retirement home. Totally insensitive, great stuff!

Things start off slow for the girls. They misspelled “Techno Expo” on the cake and Toral had difficulties demonstrating the latest cutting edge technology: a television set. After pressing ‘OK’ seven times, she almost got it turned on which really impressed the group.

The generation gap was quickly filled with something all ages can enjoy: gratuitous skin of a beauty queen with some limbering up exercises. In a heart monitor demonstration, Jennifer M. jams her arm up her shirt to set the mood. Then to add to the fun, she decides to teach an aerobics class to get her heart rate up. She was a tad more covered than Janet Jackson pool side while cranking out twenty pushups much to the delight of her titillated client.

She then tried to hook up the heart monitor to her one man audience, but unfortunately, he was already dead. Believe me, he died happy.

At day’s end, it’s amazing how much credence is placed on the spelling error. My first grade teacher was spot on; grammar and spelling are the keys to success. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in eight years of the business world, it’s that “spelling” is where the big bucks roll in. Life is just a big spelling bee. You stand against the chalkboard of life and wait to get humiliated by “Techno Expo” while your classmates make faces at you to break you concentration. (God, I hated school.)

In the boardroom, the comments directed at the girl’s team were unflattering, “Thanks for the pretty girls. Informed technicians would have helped. I was disappointed.” Translation: “They were smoking hot but they couldn’t work the devil’s box.”

The guys average a score of 8.1 which edge out the girls 7.9 average. Spelling and the fact that the guys could turn on the TV made the difference. Rebecca takes Jennifer W. who was in charge of event planning and Jennifer M. who was in charge of Viagra sales into the board room.

Donald starts, “Jennifer M, you will not be fired unless you say something really stupid.” In other words, even though you almost killed a man, Burnett won’t let me can you because you’re too darn hot so please try not to kill anyone next week.

The Donald concluded, “Rebecca, you should have brought Toral in here, she would have been fired. But you have tremendous potential so Jennifer, you’re fired.”